At the beginning, middle and the end of the day, our worship purpose is not to perform but to exalt and praise our Heavenly Father. 1 Samuel 16:7 "The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."
It is so easy to get caught up in performance mindset that our worship has to be perfect. Perfect tone, pitch, timing, and even down to the way we look when worshipping; all these things aren't necessarily bad, they are actually decent things to be conscience of. However, the Lord is looking at our heart, our posture of our worship, is it pure? Is it out of obligation? Is it about reaching a congregation or whoever is in the room? Or is it about glorifying, singing from a place of gratitude and thankfulness. Is it coming from a place of a weak song that is sung simply due to the fact that God is worthy of our time, devotion and song?
I was in a moment where I was playing piano and singing, I wanted to stretch myself and sing prophetically. This chorus erupted from my heart, it was a moment of desperation for the Lord. I was singing:
"I just want to see your face
I just want to hear your voice
I just want to feel your heart
It's all I want"
I began to sing that on repeat because it was a deep and passionate prayer on my heart. I sang this quite a few times and suddenly began to mess up the words. I was starting to get frustrated. I spoke to myself, "Lord, I thought of these words, how can I be messing them up". I was genuinely irritated because I had found a good rhythm in playing and singing. I took a breath and suddenly a new song came about. As I sang these words, tears began to well up in my eyes. The Lord was bringing new revelation to me about worship.
"Even when I mess up the words
You still know the posture of my heart
You love when I sing to you
My heart longs for you"
I was getting wrecked by the Lord. It doesn't matter if I have all the words down and memorized. It was coming from a place of true, authentic and pure love for the Lord. Pure desire to go after His heart. I can sing the wrong lyric or play the wrong note, He still is filled with joy and delight for me because I sacrificed my time to sit with my Father and spend time with Him. I'm not discredited or less than if I'm off pitch, my heart longs for the Lord and that is beautifying my relationship with Him.
Through all my days, I want to be found worshipping the Father. I want it to be done as a sacrifice and honoring unto the King. I don't care what I look like, I don't care what I sound like, all I want is to be found at the feet of the King that gave His life for me.
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